I remember it just like it was yesterday. I was living in a lovely boutique hotel in
Beverly Hills holding on to dear life while trying to kick my addiction to a
variety of drugs.
I was 26 years old back then and the Hollywood party scene had gotten
the better of me. I slept many hours each day hoping that sleep would
eventually silence the neurological damage I caused to my brain with drug and
alcohol abuse.
Realizing that only two things would make the constant noise
in my head go away, I kept on choosing the easy route which was to numb my
mind, body and feelings with alcohol and drugs.
The tough route was going cold turkey.
Because of the damage I caused to the frontal lobe of my
brain, I could no longer speak properly.
I decided to fight back and read books out loud to direct my thought
process. I needed books that were
conversational and not too complex.
Books with wisdom, courage and happy endings. Motivational books and Hollywood biographies
seemed to be a good fit for what I needed.
I read “The Ragman’s Son” by Kirk Douglas, “The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People” by
Dr. Stephen R. Covey, “The Life Of Lucille Ball” by Kathleen Brady and
others.
As I sat there on my bed in my elegant, cozy little room,
drinking vodka and orange juice, high as a kite on uppers, I was wondering if
the misery of addiction was ever going to end. Then one day I found myself between the pages
of Mickey Rooney’s biography “Life Is Too Short.” I specifically remember reading the words out
loud and how a psychic change overcame me when I read Mr. Rooney give his
opinion on drug abuse. It was a turning
point for me. It was a moment in time where
I saw myself like I never had before.
The words I read said “what you’re staying up for all night,…it ain’t
worth it.”
